While recovering from my recent accident I had what can only be described as an epiphany.
I was doing my yoga and feeling very 'Oprah-esque', getting in touch with my inner child.
In my mind I saw it...eight babies! Not just any babies, but Phineas, Rachael, India, Nathan, Courtney, Elijah, Samuel and Simon, My octuplets. It is my quest to make this dream become a realization.
I have given this idea a lot of thought over the past day or so and feel that I am mentally prepared for this journey. My main hurdle is financing my new endeavor. This will be very expensive indeed, therefor I have decided to accept corporate sponsorship. 
I will be making history with the birth of these babies so it would be wise for your company to make an investment early on to take advantage of pre-birth rates. As the birth mother of these octuplets I would be their agent, so I ask that you direct all endorsement proposals to me.
First of all I will need a crate of fertility drugs. I am looking for major drug companies to sponsor the invitro process. This would be a perfect opportunity for your company to gain maximum exposure, I will be holding a press conference during this highly intimate procedure. For 5000 US dollars I will wear your corporate logo on a fashionable headband made of 100% cotton.
If all goes as planned I should be delivering by November, more importantly during "November Sweeps" week. I am considering making the blessed event a pay-per-view special. After the initial
viewing I will consider re-broadcasting the event on cable or network television, all interested
networks email me here.
When the bundles of joy finally arrive I will be needing help caring for them, a perfect opportunity for a nanny or au pair service to step in. Imagine the exposure your company will receive when I glowingly refer to your service, "Oh, I couldn't have done it without the fine service of Insert-company-name-here childcare!" I will consider giving discounts to companies who sign-up in three month blocks. For more info click here.
I am currently living in an apartment that can't accommodate eight babies so I am
looking for a single family home. When the general public hears of your generous gift to my famous brood your sales will go up. I would prefer my home to have a minimum of six bedrooms and four baths. In my bedroom I need a walk in closet, a fireplace and a private bath.I want my room to be a sanctuary. As the mother of these children I will need a place to retreat, preferably on a different floor from the kids. I would like the home to be built on a minimum of an acre of land. I would also like to have an inground pool, for the children of course. For more info click here.
I want the best for my children, does your product or service qualify? My children will be international icons, the subject of numerous new stories, in both television and print...and as we all know the media can be relentless so a carefully placed logo on the children's garments or carriage can mean an increase in sales for your company. Being a creative individual I will assume my brood will have my gift for the arts. I am currently writing a sitcom pilot for them, something wholesome along the lines of
"Different Strokes". All interested networks (exclusion: WB network) click here.
For account information proceed to page two
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